Random Tips For New Mommas
As I share my top tips for new mammas I am literally typing this out for my own benefit as well. I am not always the best at following my own advice, but at this phase in my life it is a must. These are in no particular order but are coming straight from my heart as I attempt to tread through this motherhood journey…sigh…it’s just been one of those days.
Top five tips for new mammas. (and myself)
Stop Comparing yourself
Just the other week I took Willow to soccer practice. My husband was at the fire station. It was my first time taking her with all the kids by myself. When we got there, Willow went ahead and ran out onto the field. One of the other moms on the filed watched me walk up and said, “I don’t know how you do it, you always have everything together!” This is what she saw as I walked up… I had the baby in my little carrier pouch strapped to the front of me while carrying a picnic blanket and food for our supper. Zoe and Ty were walking peacefully behind me looking like sweet well-behaved children. She said I looked so pretty…
Here is what she missed, the reality… We were running late so Willow ran out of the car with anxiety beyond belief that she was missing practice. Our air conditioner was messed up so we were all red-faced and sweaty. When we pulled in, Zoe and Ty asked multiple times if they could eat their food I had planned for the picnic in the car. They cried when I told them no. The baby had to nurse when we pulled in the parking lot. Zoe said she had to poop when I started feeding the baby… In the midst I was praying for God to just get me to the other side of this LOONG day. ( Oh and I am wearing over sized jeans because I can’t squeeze in my own yet and my mammas shirt because I had just raided her closet. I still can’t fit in most of my clothes. The food was packed because we had run tons of errands and there was no time to eat supper at home.
The danger is that we compare. I could tell that she was thinking she wasn’t a good momma. She kept saying she needed to send her kids with me so they would be better behaved etc… I have done the same comparison game multiple times leaving me feeling inadequate. I encourage you to remember things are NEVER as they seem.
Know that you cant do it all.
A little background information. I take care of the bills and budgeting. I love it and I am a crazy person about it. I’m always trying to figure out a system and I pride myself on having our money “figured out” and making our dollar stretch. To make a long story short I got a letter in the mail saying our power was going to be turned off tomorrow because we were past due. It said we owed a huge amount. We have the money automatically drafted from our account and it hadn’t been done since January. There was a glitch in the system and I never noticed we weren’t getting charged. They had our incorrect email address so we were never getting notifications. When I investigated further I sat and cried. Why Can’t I do this??Why can’t keep it together?? Before I know it, the failure word is whispered in my ear and I start to feel overwhelmed. I want to cook healthy meals, take care of the finances, read endless stories, give cuddles all day, home school, and teach them all about God’s love. Then I think , “Good grief, when is the last time I read my Bible and didn’t fall asleep at night while praying?” I know I put a lot of pressure on myself. I’m pretty sure we all do it. The truth is, I can’t do it all perfect all the time.
The house will not be spotless.
I am not a clean freak but the sight of lots of clutter is enough to drive me crazy. Between baby swings, trucks, and pillows on the floor from playing, “Don’t touch the ground” I look and think again why can’t I keep it all together? The truth is, it will never stay clean all the time. If it was, then it would be empty.
Remember who is able.
Throughout all of my trying to accomplish the world I am missing the one who can help me to do that.. GOD. His idea of conquering the world is a lot different from mine. His is about exemplifying love throughout all of the mundane task of the everyday life. If I am constantly in a rush thinking about how inadequate I am and comparing myself to others then how can love even be apart of the equation. This season of life seems so long and tiresome but in reality I know it is fleeting. How will I spend the greatest moment of my life?
Make it count.
Look at the blessings around, enjoy them, and breathe them in. Live every day the best you can. Look for the good and beauty in the messy chaos around you. Love on your family and love on yourself a little too. This motherhood thing IS WORTH IT, it IS MESSY, it IS LOVELY. Let us always remind each other and encourage each other even if it is through our failures.
Here is to making today count…
Sharing this with: The Prairie Homestead, A Mama’s story, Raising Arrows, The Modest Mom, What Joy is Mine, Growing Home, Time Warp Wife, Thankful Homemaker, Mamal Diane, Teaching What is Good, Mom’s the word, conerstone cofessions, A proverbs 31 wife, Some of the best things in life are mistakes, Let this mind be in you, A Wise Woman Builds her home, Deep Roots at Home, Graced Simplicity, Raising Homemakers, Women Living Well, Hope in Every Season, Jill’s Home remedies, Little Natural Cottage, Our simple country Life, Raising Mighty Arrows, The Purposeful Mom, Happy and Blessed Home, Homemaker by Choice, Your Thriving Family, My Joy Filled Life. New Life Steward, Hometead simple, Let this Mind Be in You,