Birth Control, Fertility, and My Testimony

birth control

 

I have always been a run with the wind, passionate kind of person. I can remember even as a child feeling inspired and running full speed ahead. I was bound and determined at the age of maybe 8 or 9 that I was going to build a church and share the gospel to all the ends of the earth. I would pickup land magazines at grocery stores and restaurants and search endlessly to find the perfect piece of land to build my church. Even typing that out I’m thinking,”Man I was a weird kid.” I still feel like this is my calling. You may not be following me here, but read to the end and you’ll see where my heart is.

 

I am feeling extremely vulnerable to share with every one all I am about to say. This has become a huge testimony for me that I have shared with very few people. Some of this may be TMI (too much information) but I want to share everything the Lord has shown me and how He directed our steps to where we are today.

 

After 4 yeas of marriage at the age of 22 I became pregnant with our first baby. The flood of emotions were instant.  I loved my pregnancy and enjoyed every moment. My life has never been the same since that beautiful baby girl was born. I felt for the first time that this was what I was made for. It wasn’t always dreamy motherly affection, but I loved that baby a love like no other.

image

 

After she was born at my six-week postpartum appointment my OB had my prescription for birth control ready. I don’t remember her ever asking me about it. It was more like “Here is your prescription for the same birth control you were on before.” I didn’t think a thing about it and went on my merry way.

 

A year later I became pregnant with baby #2.  I enjoyed that pregnancy just as much as the first except for the fact I now had a toddler running me ragged. The world around me, in a way, was already molding my mind into thinking two was all I could handle. I started to get a lot of the “Oh you just wait till…” statements. They all ended bad.

 

My second baby girl was born 21 months after my first. My love for her was just as deep, but let me tell ya I had to remind myself of that once we got her home. She cried… a lot.  Going from one to two was a huge adjustment. I began to think every one was right!

image

 

When I went for my six-week checkup the IUD was the new fad. I mentioned it to my husband and we were both like, “Heck yeah!” I didn’t even know if I wanted any more at all. I was told it would prevent pregnancy for 5 years. I was ready to have myself back. My body, my time, and sleep. I couldn’t wait for them to get older so I could go to the gym, coffee dates with friends, shopping, sleeping in  etc…(This sweet little girl is now the most loyal, love you like no other kid I’ve ever met)

 

Then… there was a small moment that I will never forget. Nothing huge with fireworks, but it is what I believe was a real word from the Lord amidst chaos. The planting of a seed into what He would transform me to be…

 

My husband and I were sitting on the deck talking about life, money, kids, jobs, the normal stuff. We were saying something along the lines of being in God’s will and praying about things. Then, it suddenly came to me out of nowhere. I said out loud, ” You know, I never even prayed to God about getting this IUD put in.”

 

At the time I was aggravated with my situation and was going to put a stop to this craziness in my life. Now, a wave of guilt and conviction came over me.  I felt horrible about not thinking it through. To have something foreign in your body to prevent a normal function God created and calls a blessing… preventing life.  Psalm 127:3 says, “Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward.”

image

 

Up to this point I had never thought about it this way. To the world’s standards I was responsible and doing the right thing. Through a lot of prayer,  over the course of the next several months the Lord slowly began changing my heart. I asked for patience, guidance, and to see the children I had through His eyes. This was still a very private issue for me, yet I was already feeling a transformation take place.

 

I got my IUD taken out probably around 6 months later. Mainly due to all of the health risk that I found out on my own. (not from my OB )  Through the transformation God started, we started thinking, “Ok, maybe we can handle one more baby.”  Praise the Lord we were able to conceive quickly again. This is the pregnancy that truly opened our eyes.  By the grace of God I was able to see them for what they truly were…blessings. I couldn’t help but think how I tried everything in my power to prevent this miracle from happening again. I started questioning everything I had ever been taught about children, birth control, and family planning. I started seeing things in a whole new light.

 

I will never forget the night I was going to share my heart with my husband. Honestly, I was assuming he was going to laugh and that would kind of be the end of it. I was wrong.

 

Turns out God had slowly been working on his heart as well. Although the thought of not using birth control scared him to death he saw where I was coming from.  Slowly throughout my pregnancy the Lord showered patience, understanding, a calling, and confidence into our lives. Toward the end of my third pregnancy we both gave our fertility to the Lord. We decided that if we were going to trust Him with our finances, location to raise our family, and our jobs, then why not our children. Over and over the Bible calls them blessings. I believe that, and we want as many as He will give us.

 

On June 14th 2012 our first son was born 2 years after our second child. Let me say, this is the most joyous baby I have EVER been around. To think… I almost never had him. I almost never gave him the chance to be something great for God. I almost didn’t give his sisters a baby brother. I almost didn’t give his daddy a chance to play ball with his boy. I almost missed out on a lot more love. For what? Because I thought my sleep was more important. I thought my vacations would be more glamorous. I thought a toned, stretch mark free belly would make me happier.

 

As of today I am 6 months pregnant with our second son. He is the first baby that was conceived without us trying to interfere with dates, numbers, and calendars. He came out of our love for each other in God’s perfect timing. It is the most freeing thing to know that you have given over control to the most sovereign creator of the universe. Why do we think we know better anyways? He is the one who sees the future.

image

 

On to my whole building a church dream… God is fulfilling that calling right now.

 

These children that we are trying to raise diligently for God are my church. We are constantly on our knees telling God the needs of our church and thanking Him for growing our church when He sees fit. My husband is the pastor and leader and I am simply the Sunday school teacher. We are open 24/7.  Between my children, and some day my grandchildren, and great children this church God has used me for could grow quicker than anything I would have built at the age of 10. The people in this church have potential to spread God’s love to the ends of the earth. It all starts right here and right now.

 

I would encourage anyone if they have ever questioned why our society thinks a certain way about children…ask God what He thinks about it. Don’t take my word for it, but it will blow you away. I plan on posting a lot more on this subject since this is where my life is at right now. If anyone has any questions, or curiosities, don’t hesitate to ask.

 

If you want to stay up on our journey through all this please subscribe so you don’t miss anything!

 

Photo credit Pixabay

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

50 Responses to Birth Control, Fertility, and My Testimony

  • Taya says:

    What a wonderful testimony. I too had a similar experience right down to having an IUD taken out 🙂 God works in wondrous ways. Congratulations on your baby. It really just gets better from here 😉

  • Leslie Page says:

    So proud of you Brittany. So awesome to watch you grow in your faith. It is a beautiful thing. I often wonder why we make it so hard to trust God. Why that sometimes is so scary? Who else loves us more than Him? I remember that little girl that so sincerely wanted to build a church, and now with all of your heart you are building a church that will truely be a witness to the goodness of the Lord. You will never know how amazing it is for me to have you as my daughter. Love you.

  • maria a says:

    I have never used birth control although Dr’s insisted I did..my first daughter was conceived 3 months after meeting my partner but that’s after thinking I would have never have children. She is a blessing to all of us, my second one was born 4 years later but we were really trying hard after the first one ( yes all in God’s timing) I then found out I had a dermoid cyst and needed operation on my left ovary scared because there was a chance that the ovary might be removed. I trust in God and prayed for healing and my two ovaries are still intact. Three years later I had a miscarriage and Dr said I was going to have a hard time having more children but I didn’t lost hope two months later Mr 3 was on his way to this Earth..I have never use protection and Dr are amaze.i hate any kind of meds specially after hearing all those side affects.yes every body is different but we have to leave ALL in God’s hands.
    TMI right? But you are right the church is built at home..Bless you and your family.

  • Sarah says:

    My husband and I gave our fertility to God after our first baby. That baby is now 8 and we just found out we are expecting our sixth baby! The road hasn’t been an easy one, especially the opposition from loved ones, but we wouldn’t trade any of these little miracles!

  • Rachel says:

    I normally do not comment on blog posts, but I had to after reading this one. It is very refreshing to read this, and I had to send it to my husband. I was 21 when I got married last year, and I found out I was pregnant three weeks after marriage. I had already known that this was going to happen prior to our wedding. It was something that God laid on my heart. I was overwhelmed at first since we went from our first kiss on our wedding day, to marriage, to being pregnant shortly after! My husband & I never thought about birth control, but I know to the world it was crazy. I struggled with it when I was pregnant with my son since my pregnancy wasn’t as picturesque as I hoped for.. Six months after having my son, I fell pregnant again with baby number two. I am due in April and our babies will be 14 months apart. I feel so blessed and free in God’s grace and mercy to be carrying a baby girl. Your post on this was very good, Brittany. Thank you for opening up and writing about it. Every pregnancy and child are such blessings and should be celebrated. The Lord dearly loves his children… Also, the church example was awesome. Never thought about that before.

    Anyway, praying for you and your family, Brittany.. Many blessings your way.

    Rachel

    • Brittany says:

      Congratulations! It is not the common thing to do, but whenever we submit to God’s will that is where we will always be happiest:) This doesn’t mean it is always easy or that we will never want to pull our hair out. However, there is a peace that passes understanding. Looks like you have it.

    • Alicic says:

      Brittany, I got pregnant 2weeks after we got married and our first 2 are 16 months apart. I am now 29 weeks pregnant with #3 these two are going to be 14 months apart. There are days that I feel overwhelmed but I must say it is such a joy to watch them grow up and to watch them play together. I truly feel as though they are my gifts from God. I will be praying for you.

  • momstheword says:

    Congrats on your newest baby! I gave my fertility to the Lord, too, but mine was for a different reason. I just couldn’t get pregnant! And so I just had to trust Him more and more as the years went by and no baby.

    He did eventually bless us with two children here and one with Him. They are now young adults but have brought us so much joy over the years.

    I love your church analogy! Thanks for linking up to “Making Your Home Sing Monday!”

    • Brittany says:

      That’s awesome! People assume you will have 20 children when you surrender to Him. That is not the case at all. It is about trusting His plan whatever it may be for your family.

      • Heather says:

        In 8 years of no birth control, we have given birth to 2 precious babies. Now– we started with three, and adopted three more, so our numbers look a little scary to some folks. 🙁 But it’s just two that The Lord has sent thus far, and we couldn’t be happier!

  • Susan says:

    What an amzing testimony! God has blessed us with 3 wonderful blessings. My husband is still on the fence to whether or not we should “be responsible” or surrender our fertility completely. We have never used birth control, but we have used natural family planning, which has failed us 3 times, or maybe I should say God’s will has prevailed 3 times 🙂 Congratulations on your new little one!

    • Brittany says:

      What a good way to look at it, and thank you!

      • Susan says:

        Additional comments keep popping up in my e-mail inbox, and I went back and read your post and comments. I thought I should add I found out 10 days after I commented on this that I was pregnant. We are happy to have baby #4 arriving any time now 🙂

  • Danielle says:

    Hi there. I really appreciate your sharing your heart in this post! It’s been so helpful to me! My hubby and I are trying to get pregnant and it’s been one struggle after another but I know God is in control! Your testimony is an encouragement!

  • Lisa says:

    Thank you for the wonderful tears you have brought to my eye. After a very trying year of unsuccessfully wanting a second child the Lord has been reminding me at every turn that it isn’t my desire or timeline that matters. So thank you for being his instrument in my life. God bless and keep you and your family. May you all have a joy filled holiday season.

    • Brittany says:

      Your right, the key is letting go our perception of control. He has it all figured out for our best interest. I hope you have an amazing holiday season as well!

  • Thanks for sharing your story! My hubby and I were convicted of the same thing about 4 months before we were married! 9 years later and we are expecting #4 and our first boy!!! It’s been trying at times (2 miscarriages) but I wouldn’t trade the peace I have in Christ for anything. 🙂

  • Carol says:

    Beautiful testimony! I am so glad to read about the thoughtful and prayerful way you considered the gift of fertility. For many years birth control has been the norm. My daughters have been re-thinking this also.

  • Heather says:

    I love, love, love the truth and image of a family as a church. 🙂 As someone who went through the same transformation 8 years ago, I understand your heart. Thank you for sharing so that others might be blessed!

  • EC says:

    Beautiful! I repeat, just beautiful! I would love to have tea someday with you! We are in the exact same place as you, God having been SO merciful to us in His patience and grace to reveal His perfect will for our family. God bless you!!!

  • Danielle says:

    I know exactly how you feel when you say a weight is lifted off your shoulders when telling your story. I felt the same way when God spoke to me about 3 yrs ago about working outside the home. I was a sahm for about 6 yrs and then let society push me into nursing school and a full time job. Once I surrendered to Gods plan (working only 1 weekend a month) and saw how much better his plan really was (duh!), I wanted to scream my story from a mountain top. It wasnt well recieved by most wich was no surprise to me. Now I struggle with the whole birth control thing. I had preeclampsia with my last (#5). Knowing another pregnancy may be risky I am afraid to get pregnant again. But what if God has another blessing I am preventing?

    • Brittany says:

      I have to admit that I have never had a complicated pregnancy. That would be so tough. Your right, God may have something different in store for you. That is where trust and lots of prayer come in. Praying for you!

      I am a nurse too. I now work one night a week. I know exactly how you feel about shouting it all from the rooftops:)

  • Rachel says:

    Yep. It is freeing, isn’t it?!

  • Ashley says:

    I could have written this post….nearly word for word. I love how gracious our God is to open our hearts and minds before it’s too late.

  • Susan Alexander says:

    A part of me would like to do this. But then there’s the rest of me. I have 4 children spaced with God’s timing – they are 5, 3, almost 2, and a newborn. My last two pregnancies got progressively harder – I’m afraid if I got pregnant again I would be unable to walk or care for my children for the last few months. And then there’s the last birth – she came so fast we weren’t able to make it to the hospital. And then there’s the fact that I’m already stressed to my max with my 4 kids. I think 4 is right for us. Once the baby gets a bit older, I’ll be able to give my husband the time with me that he sorely needs and I’ll be able to play with my older children in the way that they crave. As much as I love it all, I am ready to be done. I guess a part of me figures that God is all powerful and, aside from removing your parts, there is nothing you can do that will prevent him from giving you a baby if that’s what you’re supposed to do.

    • Diana says:

      Dear Susan,

      You can also think about it another way – if it is God’s will for you to be done, then He can close your womb. You can trust Him to give you (or not give you) the babies He wants, and He does not make mistakes!

      Your statement that “I guess a part of me figures that God is all powerful and, aside from removing your parts, there is nothing you can do that will prevent him from giving you a baby if that’s what you’re supposed to do” does not follow Biblical ethics. One could say, “I’m going to abort my baby, but if God really wants it to live, he’ll save it” or “I’m going to throw myself off of this cliff, but if God really wants me to live, he’ll rescue me.” God requires us to obey him, and then we can trust Him for the outcome.

      I know where you’re coming from. I too have incredibly difficult pregnancies. It is that fact which has made me take so long to come to the realization that the Lord is trustworthy. But now that I have finally given the decision of “how many and when” to the Lord, it is a place of incredible peace. I can trust Him to create the children He wants in His own perfect time. Children are not accidents that happen when we don’t use birth control. They are perfect and purposeful creations of a loving Father who gives them in His perfect time as a blessing.

      A few years ago I would have written your exact post. Blessings as you continue this journey!!

    • Brittany says:

      I agree to a certain extent that God is all powerful and can make anything happen if He wants, but He also provides us a will to choose. If you have been convicted in this area of your life to give your fertility to the Lord, my advice would be to stay the path. God knows sooo much more than we do! Girl, you are not alone in your feelings and worries. We all have them. We must remember to keep giving it to God (We may have to do this numerous times a day) He equips those He calls and is always faithful. I will be praying for you!

    • You’re right…God is powerful! If you think He is so powerful that He can give you a baby even if you’re using a 99% effective way to keep the baby from coming, then I’d say He’s powerful enough to give you the grace and strength to endure through it. You can’t live your life in fear. You have to trust God. He says that children are a blessing. If God were to offer you a million dollars, would you turn it down? Probably not. That would be a huge blessing in your life. So when He says children are a blessing, why would we turn that down? If you genuinely can’t handle another child, or if the complications from the pregnancy weren’t what was best for you…don’t you think God is powerful enough to make you barren? Wouldn’t it be far better to err on the side of caution?
      By the way, God can still give you a baby if you remove all of your parts. However, it is likely He will not intervene with the science HE created. However, when we use our free will to destroy His Science, He allows it. He doesn’t have to, but He does. He lets us make our own decisions.
      I’m not trying to sound judgy. It’s not my heart.
      I say that because I was in that place for oh so long, and I just want to encourage any woman to get out of it! Feel free to read my journey here! I wish you the best of luck on whatever you decide, but may ALL of our decisions be coupled in prayer!~

      http://www.conservativechristianmom.blogspot.com/2014/01/why-i-went-from-wanting-zero-babies-to.html

  • Courtney Dowling says:

    Thank you so much. This blog post touched me more than you’ll ever know.

  • shiloh says:

    My husband and I continue to pray about God’s leading in having and raising children. We currently have 3, 3 and under. God is good!

  • Anne S says:

    Beautiful post! My husband and I have two children. They were born 20 months apart (now ages 13 and 11). When my daughter was 8 months old I had a tubal ligation. My doctor told me it was my best option, as we didn’t feel we wanted more children. At the time I was 24 years old. I didn’t grow up going to church and God was hardly ever discussed. Praying for guidance was something that never crossed my mind. Years later we started going to church and I got baptized. My ultimate regret is not seeking God’s guidance and having that tubal ligation.

    • Brittany says:

      Thank you for sharing this. I often regret putting off having children for the first 4 years of our marriage. I choose to believe that God opens our hearts and minds at different times for different reasons. We can’t go back, but we can move froward with the new knowledge He gives us everyday.

  • Diana says:

    Thank you for this article! Love it!!

  • Monica says:

    Thank you for writing this. THIS IS MY STORY!!! I so could have written this. The only difference is that my girls are further apart(3 1/2 years). I feel God has told me there will be a forth and it will be my second boy. I don’t know beyond that. God’s will be done.

  • Bridget says:

    So beautiful, I love testimonies like this! We conceived 40 days into marriage and then again 3 months postpartum…2 babies in 2 years of marriage! It had been such a joy and a blessing. It took me awhile to become at peace with God’s will after the birth of our youngest, but I am so excited about the possibility of new life in our future. Children truly are gifts in the best way!!

  • Pingback: Five Ways to Making Childhood Magical - A Mama's Story

  • Thanks for sharing this with the linkup. It definitely speaks to me. I’ve been having such a hard time with this lately.
    We also got married young. I had a miscarriage with my first pregnancy. I’ve been blessed with two beautiful daughters since then. We’ve never used any birth control, aside from Natural Family Planning. But lately I feel even this is too much. But my family would be HORRIFIED if I got pregnant again. I often need their help with babysitting and such. And we struggled financially for many years. Thankfully, things are different now.

    But my pregnancies are very difficult. They usually involve being horribly sick, throwing up for months, hospitalizations, bed rest, complications, etc. I’ve luckily had some wonderful natural births. But the lack of sleep from my youngest waking up every hour to nurse for the first 14 months of her life drove me to insanity and I lost sooo much weight it was horrifying. It made me a terrible person and a terrible mother.

    Things are much better now. Sometimes I feel God wants to give us more. But I can’t get past my fears. Miscarriage, what people will think, how sick I’ll be, how will I cook and clean for the family, dealing with the medical debt it will bring, and the first year of the child’s life.. will they ever sleep? Will they take a bottle? I just hope I’m not alone here. I’m tired of trying to avoid pregnancy. I feel so guilty.
    But the rest of the world would say having another baby would be a huge mistake.

  • Traci says:

    I agree with you wholeheartedly! My story is very similar except my husband does not feel the same way I do. He is opposed to the use of hormonal birth control but is not interested in giving his fertility to the Lord. This is a place of great pain for me. I guess I’m wondering what would you have done if your husband wasn’t on board?

    • T2 says:

      This is where I am also. I was convicted of this after baby #2 and opened up to my husband. He agreed that we should not use hormonal birth control and we now have 4 children. He has recently been discussing a vasectomy and my heart breaks at the thought of that. I want to honor my husband but am struggling with that not aligning with honoring Gods will for our family size. I’d love to hear your thoughts on this!

      • Brittany says:

        That is tough. The only answer I can give is to pour your heart out to God and pray for your husband. Next, just leave it at Jesus feet and trust in Him. That is all you can do, yet it is the best thing to do 🙂 I will be praying for you.

    • Brittany says:

      I would 100% bathe the situation in prayer and then let God be God. It would be hard…We can’t change our husbands hearts but God can. Just trust the Lord’s timing in it all:)

  • I LOVE this! Thank you for sharing! I wrote a similar post about my testimony here:

    http://www.conservativechristianmom.blogspot.com/2014/01/why-i-went-from-wanting-zero-babies-to.html

    It is SOOOO encouraging to see how God is changing the lives of Christian around the world and accepting ALL blessings in life….not just money or other worldy blessings, but the ones that His Word says are real…like children! Thank you so much for your post! It brought me to tears!

  • corrie says:

    I love this post and have been wanting to write about my own experience. In 2 days I will have our 6th baby. Every 6 week check up I take the prescription for the pill from the dr but I don’t take the pill. I haven’t been able to do it. Once I even had the prescription filled and they sat in my kitchen cupboard, I just couldn’t do it.
    I left it up to God to decide on our family size and it’s a decision that I will never regret. I had a few moments at church where I just knew that I had to leave it up to Him and that it wasn’t my decision to make. I had baby twins but I knew that I was going to go on and have more children.
    I had my first baby at 30 and now my 6th at 38 and wouldn’t change a thing about my family. Of course there are times where money is so tight or I think how will I cope or how much cleaning do I do but we get there.
    I hope that more women leave things up to God and embrace big families and what God has in store for them. My 5th baby was the easiest most placid baby in the world and I’d tell people that’s because he was sent to me that way.
    good on you for sharing your story.
    Corrie:)

  • Clara says:

    This is beautiful! Thank you for sharing your testimony on this with us! I too was convicted that trying to control when to have children was wrong in God’s eyes. Unfortunately, after ten years of marriage and six years of trying we still have not become pregnant. We are now praying for God to direct us as to whether or not adoption is the right path for us.

    I want more people to realize that world’s teaching on children and birth control is utter foolishness and God’s teaching is so beautiful!!!


Hey Y'all! My name is Brittany Styron. Sweet Country Roots is a place I hope to encourage, inspire, and bring a chuckle. Grab yourself a cup of coffee and join conversations about marriage, babies, homeschooling, frugal living, good food, and an old fashioned way of thinking.

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 187 other subscribers