Large Families (Do It Well)

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I do not consider myself to have a large family yet. When our fourth baby arrives in a few weeks, I’m sure most people will say that we do. I have always been drawn to families with lots of children. They intrigue me. I wonder how the dynamics work, what systems they have in place to care for their children, and basically how they function on a day-to-day basis.

 

When you mention a family with lots of children to someone they typically think of two different scenarios. They imagine huge Christmas dinners with well mannered children laughing and story telling by the fire. Others may imagine a depleting bank, with rowdy dirty kids going unnoticed, left lonely and lost in the shuffle. Neither scenario is very accurate but both could be a close possiblity depending on how close you cling to God when growing your family.

 

Don’t get me wrong, raising even one child takes total dependence on the Lord, but logically the more children you have the easier it is to get lazy and turn a blind eye to issues that arise in your family. A very important thing that us parents of growing families (biologically or through adoption) is that we must constantly rely on the Lord to help us DO THIS JOB WELL. It isn’t just throwing your hands up when you give your fertility to the Lord and hoping for the best. If this is our calling we must give our 100% on a daily basis. We don’t just stop when we surrender our entire lives to Him. We must continually seek His guidance in every area. Think about it this way. Missionaries don’t just pray for God’s leading about what country to go to then stop relying on God when they get to their destination. We must remember that just because there are a lot of little bodies around our supper table our work has just begun. Our families are our mission field. Misconceptions of large families come from the ones who gave up trying to sharpen their arrows. We must stay diligent with each and every child that comes along.

 

Here lately I have been pondering on exactly what God wants me doing with these kids. During pregnancy it’s easy to get consumed with the tangible things you need for the arrival. What about the few months after when sleep deprivation is in full swing and there aren’t any more freezer meals in the freezer? Through all of the distraction I must stay true to my calling. TO RAISE THEM WELL FOR HIM. I felt led to write a little list to help keep me stay focused. I obviously will be adding on quite often…

 

Ways to do it well

1. Exemplify Jesus. Easier said than done huh? This is so powerful. Jesus said “Let the little children come to me.” Man, I’m convicting myself as I type this! How often do I tell them to give me five minutes of peace, or roll my eyes when they call my name for the gazilionth time? My arms need to stay open and ready for a small one to jump in no matter what time of day. Pretty easy for your arms to be open, but your heart has to be there too. The only way we can do this is constant PRAYER!

 

2. Let God’s goodness never be far from your lips. Talk about your blessings ALL THE TIME. The positivity will rub off on them and help you keep your head up too.

 

3. Discipline with diligence. This is equally as important as our job of holding and hugging them.  In fact, discipline is another form of love. Don’t give in to the temptation to slack off because you are outnumbered and don’t have the time. Your only hurting yourself and the children in the long run. Weed out disobedience and defiant behavior as soon as you see it. Take your time with this, and when it pops back up weed it again and again. God does this with us continually.

 

4. Stretch your dollar and show them how to do it. Never talk about not having what you need, but talk of God’s providence each and every time another child was born. Show them what hard work really is and how to save and be good stewards. Prove to them that money is never a factor in God’s callings. Treat them more special then the paycheck.

 

5. Teach them how to give attention. Of course nothing compares to a parents love and affection, but when you teach your children to give it out to other siblings then someone is ALWAYS getting showered with attention. When or fourth is born they will have five other people to look after them, give them hugs and kisses and be their buddy.

 

6. Facilitate sibling relationships…I mean really work hard at it. Don’t leave disputes unsettled or let jealousy, anger, or selfishness take root in their hearts. What better way to learn to love this dying world than to start with the people you live with. Take the time to teach conflict resolution and how to be kind to one another and build each other up.

 

Do y’all have anything I can add to my list? I would love to hear how you do your job well or how your trying to:) Subscribe and share!

 

Sharing this with: The Prairie Homestead A Mama’s story, Raising Arrows, The Modest Mom, What Joy is Mine, Growing Home, Time Warp Wife, Thankful Homemaker, Mamal Diane, Teaching What is Good,  Mom’s the word, A proverbs 31 wife, Some of the best things in life are mistakes, Let this mind be in you, A Wise Woman Builds her home, Deep Roots at Home, Graced Simplicity, Raising Homemakers, Hope in Every Season, Jill’s Home remedies,  Our simple country Life, Raising Mighty Arrows, The Purposeful Mom, Happy and Blessed Home,  My Joy Filled Life. New Life Steward, Hometead simple, 

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6 Responses to Large Families (Do It Well)

  • Shelly says:

    I have 11 children. and something that is really necessary is to give your children the responsibility of chores. There is just no way one mom can do it all, and my kids know that. When they seem disgruntled at times, I remind them that our family is a unit and things will not go smoothly if we do not all pitch in.

  • sarah hurst says:

    brittany, what a great reminder and perspective shift! i might need to print out this list and refer back to it, especially on those challenging days! you’re such a great writer, thanks for sharing!!

  • Rach D says:

    These are great tips! We have 5 children and I find with each one I am required to depend more on Him…AND learn the practical art of stretching with what we have 😉
    Great post…
    Rachael @ Diamonds in the Rough (http://www.parentingandhomeschoolinginfaith.com)

  • Hopefully it’s because I only have 1 and he is only 17 months, but I’ve never even really considered some of these things. Focusing on the positive and speaking of how the Lord is providing in our life is definitely something I need to work on because I rarely say that out loud right now. I’ll be referring back to this, I’m sure. Thanks!


Hey Y'all! My name is Brittany Styron. Sweet Country Roots is a place I hope to encourage, inspire, and bring a chuckle. Grab yourself a cup of coffee and join conversations about marriage, babies, homeschooling, frugal living, good food, and an old fashioned way of thinking.

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