Disease of Perfection
Ever feel like your in a whirlwind of perfection everywhere? I just don’t understand why all of the kid’s craft pins on Pinterest have sparkling clean kitchen in the background with a toddler holding a sparkly paper towel roll with pipe cleaners sticking out of it. Y’all know you’ve seen stuff like this. And if your honest with yourself, like me, you sometimes think, “Dang, I need to be doing that! Why can’t I get myself together enough to have a sparkling clean house filled with sweet crafts from all my children?”
I’m just not convinced that mamas back then had it this tough. Perfection is thrown in our face. Even we ourselves can hide behind our precious Facebook pictures and clever status updates. I don’t know about y’all but I’m ready to be REAL! I don’t have it all together, not even close.
I don’t post in detail about my day often because it would look something like this… My Morning: Today I sprung out of bed and went downstairs as quickly as possible, excited beyond belief to spend some time with God?? Nope! Y’all, it’s to be by myself with my coffee! (I know that is terrible…I’m jut being real here.) About five minutes later I hear little footsteps so I roll my eyes, then automatically feel guilty because I know one day I will miss this. I cuddle with her for a few minutes till I fix her breakfast, then start to clean the kitchen from the night before, mad at myself the entire time that I did that again… I start to hear the other ones wake up so I load the dishwasher as quickly as I can because the baby likes to climb in it.
See what I mean?? I’m thinking I’m not the only one who has mornings like this. (I hope not)
Let’s take the mask off mamas and start being real. We need each other. Let’s talk and blog about how we sat in our messy kitchens and read to unbathed children in pajamas. Let’s stop pretending that we have it all together, because we don’t, and we never will. They are raising us just as much as we are raising them. Today I’m boycotting perfection and I’m gonna wrap my arms around God’s grace and my stinky children and enjoy every moment.
Are ya with me? Subscribe and share what you are boycotting today!
19 Responses to Disease of Perfection
Hey Y'all! My name is Brittany Styron. Sweet Country Roots is a place I hope to encourage, inspire, and bring a chuckle. Grab yourself a cup of coffee and join conversations about marriage, babies, homeschooling, frugal living, good food, and an old fashioned way of thinking.
Love the BEING real thing. It’s so hard these days with the pressure of having it ALL together! I don’t want to pretend that I have it all together either. I’m not super mom and I make mistakes everyday! Thankful for God’s Grace and Forgiveness! I’m visiting from http://www.aheartforthehome. Thanks for sharing on A MaMa’s Story!
Well…as you know, I don’t have children living at home anymore, but I do keep my precious grandchildren overnight on occasion. While it is wonderful and I love EVERY moment I have with them, it is also exhausting. I honestly don’t know how you could have perfection and love on those sweet kids at the same time. I appreciate the fact that you are a great wife and mom. There will be time again for the rest when they are all grown up (or at least older and not as needy). I reposted a Facebook post last night that talked about this very thing. I can’t remember the exact words, but the jist of it was that good moms had dirty dishes, unmopped floors, piled up laundry, etc. I also like the quote that my son, Jason, and daughter inlaw, Tina, have hanging on their family picture wall. It goes like this “We might not have it all together, but together we have it all.” That pretty much sums up what life is all about. Our family and friends are much more important than any of the other things in life that we put emphasis on! So, here’s to you, Brittany! Way to go!! I vote you wife and mother of the year!!
Thank you so much for your sweet words, it means a lot:)
I sometimes wonder if those “perfect pinners” have an entirely seperate house set up with pristine rooms ready for the photo shoot but never to be lived in.
I think real life is much more messy and much more real (thank goodness!)
Thanks for linking up!
Sarah @ A Cat-Like Curiosity
Ha Ha! I love that!
I am cracking up at Sarah’s idea of the “perfect pinners” and their separate houses. They would have to, right? I have a hard enough time just keeping up with all the incidentals that go along with having seven children… from pockets full of rocks and slime and heaven knows what to football gear and dance bags and library books… sigh…
I had to kind of laugh because I’m linked up right behind you on The Life of Faith and my post was about perfectionism, too. We must have been on the same wavelength!
I really “get” this post 🙂
As a work-in-progress who is recovering from perfectionism, I appreciate this post. 🙂 I think the most genuine people are the most lovely people and naturally attract others without even trying. Some of my favorite spiritual leaders are those who aren’t afraid to be real! I’m your neighbor at Titus 2 Tuesday linky party. 🙂
“I’m boycotting perfection and I’m gonna wrap my arms around God’s grace…” I love this!
It’s always good to hear that I’m not the only one that doesn’t have it all together.
Can I say a nice loud, “Amen!”. I had a conversation just Sunday with a new mom who asked me why no one ever talks about how hard it is to become a mom. She said it feels like it is a secret club & no one shares the truth about the difficulties. So yes!!! it is about time that we shed the masks.
FYI – my dishes are washed but are still in the drainboard, now dried, but waiting to be put away 🙂
I visited from A Wise Woman & I am glad that I did!
Have a great Wed.!
Joanne
So glad to hear someone else say it out loud! Preach it sister!
I’m joining you in the boycotting effort against perfection! Thank God for His wonderful grace and, of course, for stinky babies 🙂 I saw your post on the “Hearts for Home” link-up. Love this!
definitely we need to be real and acknowledge that we don’t have it all “together”…no matter what our age. women/wives from years ago had different kinds of problems. very little leisure time for one. isn’t it odd that our gadgets have given us more leisure time and there sesems to be more dissatisfaction? hmmm:)
and i lump myself, a 65+ grandma in with you. i have observed women for a lot longer…starting with my mom in the 50’s. but i see how easy it is to be dissatisfied when we see all the possibilities for decorating, buying, etc. when it is so convenient to push a button and charge it. learning satisfaction with what GOD has provided does not come easily…at least for me.
it seems that gratefulness and contentment doesn’t come easiy…or naturally. thankfully, GOD’s grace is lush. He provides the abundant resources we need…not to be perfect or robotic, but to be human and real.
Pingback: The Random Five – 8/24/13 | Days & Thoughts
Glad to my stinky baby isn’t the only one who likes to climb into the dishwasher!
Imagine what we could do in our families, churches and communities if we were willing to take off our masks and let people see God in us, rather than the perfection we want to show them.
Well said!!! Was just reading the book, “I was a Really Good Mom Before I Had Kids” and this echoes it well!! Thank you.
Oh, and you just described my morning almost perfectly….
THANK YOU!
I am a middle aged mama who has been slogging through motherhood for 19+ years. (you want to hear something funny? I’ve literally wrestled over the word ‘slogging’ ALL DAY, afraid to admit the truth for fear I’ll be found out!) I have found it very difficult to enjoy my children and be in the moment–in THEIR moments– because of this fake, perfectionistic ‘thing’ that has been laid on me by our extended families, friends, church members and the homeschool ‘superstars’ of the day.
My reality: I have wonderfully personable (read: extroverts to the MAX!!!) kids who fully live and inhabit every inch of life and whatever space they are in. The flip side of that kind of personality is that their rough edges, unformed manners, character flaws and sinful natures are daily on display for all the world to see. As a perfectionistic, introverted mama who was raised in a ‘children are to be seen and not heard’ world, you can IMAGINE my discomfort as I try to toe the line of family perfection held before me by my fellow sisters, while holding my ‘tigers’ by their tails, red faced. I. AM. EXHAUSTED.
So, reading this is life to me and truly convicting! I’ve no doubt that I myself have even made other mamas feel ‘less than’ with my posing on a day when my children happened to rise to my unreasonable levels of expectation…or more likely…I was somewhere without them (ha!). Oh, Father, forgive me!
Over the years, our family has tended to attract opinionated, ‘perfect’ supermamas who have felt it their duty to enlighten me about all the ways I’m failing as a mother and how offensive my children (and while they are at it, my husband and I) are to them. Unfortunately, as I have been in varying stages of my own walk with Jesus, instead of standing on the truth of who I am in Christ, I have internalized their opinions and found they have cast dark shadows on my precious ones and clouded my ability to truly see them.
And the outcome? My family tends to walk in a lot of rejection.I mean, if your own self/wife/mama doesn’t accept you…well, who will? I’m laid low by your post today as I am gently convicted by the Holy Spirit that I have fallen prey to this trap of the enemy. You named it so aptly for what it is: Perfectionism is A DISEASE. And the only cure must be Love? Allowing God’s Love to penetrate our own hearts and accepting our own imperfections, extending Love to our husbands and children tenderly as the ‘one another’ verses tell us to in the Word.
Bless you for being REAL and for being the vessel God used to expose my brokenness and His redemption.
Wow, what an amazing testimony. I think when we are honest, we have ALL fallen into this trap, and the people who say they haven’t are STILL PRETENDING! This is exactly what the enemy wants, to steal our joy. The devil is sneaky because he is able to put like minded God fearing women into contest with each other. We ALL need God and His amazing grace every minute of the day. Once you realize it’s about Him, He covers all the mess and gives you glimpse of it all through His eyes. Let me tell ya, I’m convicted of this very thing every single day. You are not alone in this struggle to shake off the expectations. It is so worth it when we lay it all down at His feet. Thank you for encouraging me:)
Thank you and God Bless you for being the one to say it out loud!