How To Make it on One Income (Part 1)
First of all, let me tell ya I think it’s extremely important for a momma to stay home with her babies if at all possible, in fact, it’s Biblical. With that being said, there are a gazillion circumstances that can interfere with that dream. Seasons come and seasons go, but I strongly believe that with a commitment to God and a plan (the plan may contain many steps) this can be a reality.
For some, it’s as simple as looking at your money, maybe selling a few things, then bam… momma is home. For others, myself included, this is not the case. We have been on a five-year plan so far to get me permanently home. We have taken baby steps, yet we have made tremendous progress. Some may ask why we don’t put our faith in God and I just quit, and come home believing He will provide. I am certain we would be provided for if we took this step, but I also feel as though we made the mistake of counting on my income long ago before children came along and got ourselves into debt. It is now our responsibility to rely on God, work our tails off, and slowly dig ourselves out of the mess we have gotten ourselves into.
When I was pregnant with our first baby I worked three 12 hour night shifts a week at the hospital as a nurse. Once she was born up until this past January I have worked every Friday and Saturday night 12 hour shifts. Since January, when my third baby turned 7 months, I cut back to one 12 hour shift a week. We have now been working on me cutting one of those shifts out when baby number 4 arrives at the end of March.
It has not been easy, but it has been so worth it! If I could go back in time I wish we would have understood the importance of the mother being home and had already prepared mentally and financially. I hope to teach my daughters the importance of their role in mother hood and to teach my son the importance of providing well for his wife and children. The more I am home I can see the full circle of how I feel that God designed the family to function, and it is evident in the stress level and happiness in our home.
I feel that it has been satan’s agenda to keep families in debt feeling as though there is no way out. This causes the mom and dad to go to work, leaving their children to be raised by others, all while trying to make ends meet. This is not the way God intended. Debt is wrong on so many levels. You are essentially a slave. We currently only own on our mortgage and are working with every penny to pay it off as quickly as possible. Trusting God that through hard work and determination we can bring our family to the way its meant to be. No debt, with money and time to bring up the next generation, and help a dying world.
With me cutting back I have seen over and over how God has honored our decision. No, we haven’t had any surprise checks in our mailbox, but He has provided peace, security, and happiness that speaks volumes. I have become very passionate about this subject just because I have seen what it has done for my family and I want to share it with everyone, yet not wanting to make others feel bad for tough circumstances they are in. My prayer is to encourage that it IS possible. I will be sharing many more tips in the future!
Linked to Raising Arrows
Importance of Family
One of the things I hope to pass down to my children is the importance of time well spent with family. Time that is unhindered by clocks and schedules but is still shortened by laughter, and days full of reminiscing. I want to teach them to never take the opportunities for granted. We had the privilege to spend the last week in Lake Keowee in South Carolina at an amazing lake house with over 30 of us all together including Aunts, Uncles, Sisters, Brothers, Cousins, and Grandparents. We can’t get this precious time back.
There were many mornings of people staring at the coffee pot waiting for that first cup to head to the front porch and watch the sun hit the water and finally our faces. There were huge plates of pancakes, cinnamon rolls, fruit, breakfast casseroles, and bacon going around. Soon after that, little kids started running to get in bathing suits, to them that is when the day starts. The rest of the day was spent in water, on sand, in a boat, in a kayak, snacking, sipping on pina coladas or iced coffees, Pandora blaring the country music, slathering another layer of sunscreen, playing cards, watching the ball game, and basically soaking in every moment of lake Keowee.
The nights were spent pulling out the big plates once again and filling them with mac n cheese, chicken, slaw, meatballs, potatoes, and green beans. The late night campfire with the most beautiful moon reflecting off the water will be a long lasting memory for me. As well as the good old fashioned gambling game we all played around the table with three dollars a piece topped off with a batch of our familie’s famous homemade stickies. Then came ice cream, couch sitting, and TV watching. Unable to hear the TV from all the comments about what was on it! Laughter and blankets filled the room as one by one people went to bed to start all over again the next day.
As it draws to a close I am ready to get home, back to my normal. I only like to escape for so long, but it sure was nice to escape with people you love the most.
…and one more with Zoe not screaming:)
As Long as the Babie’s Healthy?
image courtesy of hin255/freedigitalphotos.net
Most people have heard this their entire life. I have even said this statement myself. “It doesn’t matter if you are having a baby boy or a baby girls as long as it is healthy.” Just over a year ago this statement has started to strike a nerve with me. Not that anyone means anything by it when they say it, I certainly never did, but what if my baby isn’t what society would consider healthy? Then what? Am I not supposed to want it?
Just as in my previous post about God having a plan for everyone before the beginning of time. That goes for the, “Unhealthy babies” as well. I can stand as a testimony of my amazing sister Mallory who has severe autism. She has never spoken and has had seizures the majority of her life. She lives with my mom and step dad and will the rest of her life unless she is with me. This so-called unhealthy baby is now a woman who is such a blessing and a joy. She is wanted, loved, accepted, and beautiful. She knows nothing but God’s love and has never been tainted by this world. Trust me, she is closer to perfect than any of us could ever dream to be.
When someone like this is born into your family I strongly believe that the Lord keeps His hand on those families to equip them with the love and patience they need to persevere when things can be difficult. It would be an extreme understatement to say that we have experienced amazing blessing because of Mallory in our lives. I want to proclaim it from the rooftops that I would be honored if we were blessed with a child that needed extra grace from God to care for. I have seen the blessings overflow and felt the joy. I’m sure others would think this is crazy but Tim and I have considered adopting a child with special needs one day when God leads us in that direction. If it hadn’t been for Mallory I would have never learned these invaluable life lessons or have been able to teach my children. I am going to try my best to break my own habit of making the comment to parents and try to share a different perspective when the comment is said to me. Any one else ever pondered on this comment? What are your thoughts?
For The Worn Out Momma
Let go of imperfection, inadequacies, and comparisons. Let go of failures, inexperience, and your negative self image. Let go of discouraging thoughts, satan’s whispers, and the lies. Let go of the guilt, time restraints, and the fast pace. Let go of the uncrossed to do list, unmade beds, and dirty dishes. Let go of meals from scratch, frustration toward kids, and a bad attitiude toward your husband.
Instead…
Hold on to God’s perfection through your faith, your more than adequate in God’s eyes. Hold on to friendships that push you to grow. Hold on to memories of failures to see how far God has bought you. Hold on to the verse that tells you that you were made in the image of God. Hold onto every experience, they are gifts to share with others. Hold onto encouraging thoughts, prayers, and truth. Hold on to God’s grace, freedom from the clock, and savoring moments. Hold onto people who made your to do list long, slept in the beds, and made the dirty dishes. Hold on to cereal and corndogs. Hold on to the hugs around your neck and a man by your side.
Here is to letting go of things in order to hold on more tightly to the most important.
Advice for my Children about Marriage
First of all my prayer is that you will all one day find that person God has meant for you to be with, and will be able to experience the rewards within a marriage. The marriage relationship is the most important one between us all. It puts the entire world into existence. When you make the decision to make the vow to God it should be talked of, dreamed of, prayed over, and held as the highest decision you will ever make. One of the most important qualities to search for when looking for your spouse to marry someone who’s number one passion is to pursue after God. When you find that person the rest falls into place. No, they will never be perfect, but you can trust that God’s hand is on their life and they know it.
To my girls, honor this man you have prayerfully chosen above all others. Talk highly of him to others. Learn to rely on God’s grace to bring the joy in your life, because trust me he is incapable of doing it all, only God can. I know it can be tough but ask God daily to give you a cheerful attitude, because you will set the tone of your home. Make it the place your husband and children never want to leave. When you have those days where the tears fall, and you’ll have them… Go in your room, shut the door, get on your knees, and pray for God’s strength to make it through. He is powerful in your weakness.
To my boy, show the wife that you have prayed over that you honor her above all others. Ask her what is going on through her mind often and prepare yourself to listen. Provide her with security and remind her often of how much she means to you. Stick up for her, be on her side, and encourage her. When you do these things sit back and watch the joy fill her eyes to know her heart is safe with you. Work hard for your family and provide for them. When you start to feel the weight of the world on you shoulders, and you will… Go to your room, shut the door, get on your knees, and pray for God’s strength to make it through. He is powerful in your weakness.
Now for some true honesty, this marriage relationship is amazing , wonderful, and down right hard at times. There is no way around that. Let me tall ya what others will not tell you. Marriage is NOT meant for your happiness. When your unhappy PRAY, when your lonely PRAY, when you don’t think you can do it any more PRAY. He is the only answer. When you come to Him holding up a marriage that you promised for forever to Him He will honor that and bring you whatever it is you are needing.
Forgive them, when they mess up again, forgive them, and then when they mess up again, forgive again. God is the best example of this. Don’t ever speak of the word divorce or seperation in your homes. Don’t provide the way out. Protect your marriage as you would your own life. Whatever is God’s, satan will attempt to break it apart. Fight for it and you will reap the rewards. If you think your children would be better off, they won’t. If you think you would be better off, you won’t.
Another piece of advice is to surround yourself with other families that share your values about marriage, but don’t compare. Trust me, NOBODY has it all together no matter what things look like on the outside. We are all in the same boat and all need JESUS! May you find the person to forever link arms with to go on your crazy roller coaster of a life with. Your dad and I will always be here for you and I pray daily that we can be that influence to give you sweet memories of a hardworking and blessed marriage.
I’m linking this post with:
The Prairie Homestead, A Mama’s story, Raising Arrows, The better Mom,The Modest Mom, What Joy is Mine, Far Above Rubies, Growing Home, Heavenly Homemakers,Time Warp Wife, Thankful Homemaker, Mamal Diane, Teaching What is Good, A cat like curiosity, Mom’s the word, conerstone cofessions, A proverbs 31 wife, Some of the best things in life are mistakes, Let this mind be in you, A Wise Woman Builds her home, CSAHM Parenting Linkup, Deep Roots at Home, Graced Simplicity, Raising Homemakers, Women Living Well, Hope in Every Season, Jill’s Home remedies, Little Natural Cottage, Our simple country Life, Raising Mighty Arrows, The Purposeful Mom, Consider the Lillies, Happy and Blessed Home, Homemaker by Choice, Your Thriving Family, My Joy Filled Life. New Life Steward, Hometead simple, Christian Mommy Blogger, Let this Mind Be in You, Heart Reflected
Learning to Love Distractions
So the other day I had the opportunity to have 3 hours all by myself at home, not one kiddo was with me. Man, did I get a ton of stuff done! I was able to get all of my tutor stuff together to meet with our home school group the next day. I emptied the dishwasher, reloaded it, took out the trash, put away folded laundry, ate some snacks, and even had supper cooking when everyone returned. Honestly, I felt more accomplished than I had in awhile. I had on clothes without food all over them, my hair was down and brushed, and my home was neat and orderly.
During all of the busyness to cross off my to to do list I caught myself thinking, “This is awesome! All I need is maybe once a week of this and I might could stay on top things.” I immediately felt convicted. It’s funny how God will give you what you think you need only to reveal your sinful nature, and show us what we REALLY need.Why is it that my perception of accomplishment involves no clutter? If I really think about it, the days I truly accomplish the work God has set before me, and do it well you will find me with more stains on my shirt to count, hair in a messy pony tail, markers and coloring books covering the table, and my kitchen spices all over the kitchen floor. All the kids stink from rolling around outside in the dirt, but they are laughing and dancing when Daddy comes home. This day to day life of children scattered at my feet as I try to manage our home is an example of Jesus and His love. If I am by myself then no one is learning, not even me. When Jesus was on this earth He faced distraction after distraction as He was trying to disciple people for His kingdom. On one occasion He was on His way to heal someone on their death bed, when a woman stopped and pulled on His robe to get His attention. He stopped, and gave her healing and love. On another occasion children were even running up to Him as He was doing what most would consider more important work. Jesus recognized the importance and saw that these were God ordained situations to share His love. Even His disciples were trying to push them away but Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me.” Yes, these kids can be a distraction…or is it all the other things that are the true distraction???
The relationships we are forming and our perspective on distractions that mess up our routine have the chance to be life altering, and world changing. To look at these children in the eye and let them know that they truly matter, are loved, and that I have their best interest. I’ll do great for awhile, then the girl who wants to pretend she’s perfect creeps back in and wants the laundry caught up, with spotless floors. I am slowly realizing that at times this can be accomplished, but it is not reality on a day to day basis. There are children who need to be cuddled, read to, pushed on the swing, bathed, fed, and basically just need their momma’s love. In this stage of life with another sweet one on the way, and God willing more in the future, I will be in this stage for quite awhile. When I can drop my need for perfection is when God brings in the true freedom and the joy of motherhood. This is what God does for me every day. He is grabbing my face every day, looking at me in the eye, and reminding me of His love. This is exactly what He has called me to do. Imagine if our children, their children’s children etc.. put people ahead of things to be accomplished. This world would be a much sweeter, richer place and their life would be so full. Mommas, it starts with us right here right now.
This is a picture of the kids licking cookie dough off the beaters:)
DIY Laundry Detergent
I have been making our own laundry detergent for over two years now. It started out as just plain curiosity when I randomly found a recipe online. I knew I absolutely hated spending money on cleaning supplies so I thought I’d give it a try. I haven’t gone back since! This recipe is a dry detergent, but you could certainly try a liquid one if you would rather. The only draw back to the liquid is that you usually have to let it sit overnight. If your anything like me…when you run out of your detergent, you usually have a couple of loads waiting on ya.
Homemade laundry detergent
1 bar soap, grated -I use whatever is on sale in bulk at Costco. Right now I’m using Lever 2000. I’ve been told Ivory is a great brand as well.
1 cup Borax
1 cup washing soda
There ya have it! I use my cheese grater for the soap. Then just stir them all up. Use 1 TBS per load. 2-3 TBS for very large or heavily soiled loads.
Cost breakdown:
1 55 ounce box of super washing soda 3.99
1 76 ounce box of Borax 4.99
1 10 pack bar of soap. Sorry y’all have no idea how much I paid for this.
My washing soda and borax last me many batches. Each batch makes about 32 ounces. With that amount you get between 32 and 64 loads of laundry.
A Special Birthday with a Very Special Announcement
Oh, our sweet, sweet Willow Ann, where do I begin? I’ll start from the day you were born, since it was by far one of the greatest days of my life. You let me feel the joy of mother hood for the first time. From that moment on, my life has never been the same. I’ll never forget the emotions I felt the first week we bought you home. I was made complete. It was breathing in God’s purpose for the first time, you sweetheart; gave me that. It’s funny how God knew you would someday be a big sister. You have always had a strong independent character that leads just as the oldest sibling, and you do it so well. From the very beginning you have lit a fire under your dad and I to hold tighter to Jesus so He can show us what to do with your WILD and sweet spirit.
In a way this day makes me nervous, because I remember my fifth birthday. I realize that these memories we are making right now, you will possibly be able to retell to your own children some day. When your first baby turns five I hope you can recollect and tell them of the sweetness of family and friends that have surrounded you today to celebrate everything about you, and this new passage of childhood that awaits you.
You my dear, are one of a kind. Your my sweet pea, my sunshine, my answered prayer, and purpose. Your what we call, in the words of Faith Hill, “A wild one with an angel’s face.” Your beauty shines from the inside out and you make the best parties in whatever room you enter. You were born for something special. As you start forming your memories in the years to come I pray you will always see the Lord’s hand through it all. He has you Willow, please don’t ever forget that. Thank you for giving us the privilege to be your Momma and Daddy and for teaching us, and loving us the entire way. Happy 5th birthday sweetheart!!!
Today we were also able to share with everyone that God has blessed us once again with another sweet one. God is so good!
Had to add this picture of Zoe because she is just so stinking precious!
Price tag of Children
To My babies.
Come to find out, the eleven o clock news says that I should have thought long and hard before welcoming you or any other child into our family. Statistics say that y’all are going to cost us over 200,000 a piece! According to them, this price tag that has been placed on you is a huge burden to couples who are yearning for their perfect family photo shoot with their perfectly dressed little boy and little girl.
My darlings, let momma tell ya, they’ve got it all wrong. A price tag does not belong anywhere near a precious life like yours. You are a gift that keeps on giving. No, I may not go on a cruise every year or drive the newest vehicle on the market. But my heart and lap are full. God has loaned you to us, and He will provide for you better than we could ever dream of. You are loved, valued, and were planned long ago. Our bank account does not reflect if you were worth it or not.
My precious ones, let me also tell ya. This world makes you think you are entitled to many things that you are not. You may not have all the newest shoes or name brand clothing, but you will always have clothes on your back. You may not have every latest gadget or cell phone, but you will have a momma and daddy who want to talk to you face to face. You might not have fancy dinners at all your favorite places, but your momma will make you a feast every night. You might not be able to stay in the finest resorts on vacation, but you will get to stay up late by a campfire all night.
Don’t let this world trick you into placing price tags on places they don’t belong . If you can remember this, your life with be richer and fuller than you could have ever imagined…this is how we feel about you.
Shared with Raising Arrows
Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip Granola
This recipe is one of my families favorites. I have given this as part of birthday gift, Christmas gifts, and have also given it to a new momma. It looks so enticing in a mason jar with a cute ribbon on the lid. We usually have this granola as our cereal in the morning. Other options include using it as a topping on your yogurt, pancakes, or even just eat the stuff plain. It is much cheaper than store bought granola and taste delicious!
Yall, this is so easy…
Melt together
- 5 TBS butter
- 3 TBS coconut oil
- 3/4 cup of crunchy peanut butter
- 3/4 cup brown sugar
- 1/4-1/2 cup of honey
- 1 TSP of vanilla
Pour over 5 cups of oatmeal in a greased casserole dish and stir well.
Bake at 350 degrees for 15 minutes, stir a bit, then put in another 10 minutes.
Once it has completely cooled add in some mini chocolate chips. Or… you could be like us and get yourself a small bowl while its warm and let the chocolate melt in the granola. At the end you’ve got you some good old chocolate milk when your cereal bowl is empty:)
Hey Y'all! My name is Brittany Styron. Sweet Country Roots is a place I hope to encourage, inspire, and bring a chuckle. Grab yourself a cup of coffee and join conversations about marriage, babies, homeschooling, frugal living, good food, and an old fashioned way of thinking.
