Against The Grain (Birth Control)
Are any of you the, “Going against the grain kind of people,” like me? As a teenager many people referred to me as rebellious. I can see why they would say that:) As I look back over my life I can see God’s hand in my rebellion. He gave me that stubborn personality to go against the grain at times…well, most of the time. I used to feel guilty about always bucking the system and wondered why I couldn’t just be like everyone else.
A truth I have slowly started to process is that we all aren’t supposed to be the same. There are some systems that are meant to be questioned, bucked, and rebelled against altogether. This blog is an outlet for me to raise awareness about things we go along with every day and test them to see if we are really making progress.
One issue that is near and dear to my heart that God revealed to me almost two years ago was the value we place on life. I think most Christians would agree that abortion is wrong. We get in an uproar when the Roe vs. Wade anniversary comes around. We rally and give opinions, which are all great. But…what about birth control? When we question this normal practice the facts are clear to see that they are abortifacients in themselves. We get statistics on the amount of abortions every year, but what about all of the chemical ones that go unknown because our bodies are having a heavier period than usual due to our birth control method?
When I found out this information I was floored!
The majority of birth control methods including the pill, IUD, the patch, and Depo Provera all effect the lining of the uterus enabling the newly fertilized egg to implant thus it is starved and dies. Of course the birth control industry denies that their product can cause an abortion because of their definition of when life begins. To them it begins once implantation occurs.
This is simply not true.
When the egg and sperm unite (fertilization) is when life begins. When they meet, immediately there is a genetically different human being than the parents. It is ridiculous how they try to over analyze the definition of life. This is not discussed in our OB/GYN offices. I could have ignorantly killed children all because I was going with the norm. I blame a lot of this on being uneducated. I hate to use it as an excuse, but it is the only one I have for the reason I was on the pill and IUD for so long. You get married, get on birth control, and have sex. No questions asked, it’s just what you do. WE MUST START ASKING OURSELVES QUESTIONS. When we can line up our decisions with God’s word then that will open up the door for other people to ask. No need to force anything in their face, but offer information and let God do the rest.
Another reason why this means so much to me is the fact that many of women’s cancers along with other health issues have stemmed from the use of birth control. There are many lawsuits going on right now against some of the birth control companies. When we mess with our body’s natural, God-given design we are bound to run in to problems.
Whenever you go on a new type of birth control you are taking hormones. When we start to complain of headaches, fatigue, breast tenderness, break through bleeding, nausea, and decreased sex drive our doctors tell us this is normal and if it doesn’t go away after a few weeks then we can try a new kind.
What? Why aren’t we concerned about this?
We fuss over hormones in our chicken, but are rarely upset over the hormones we take in our bodies to prevent babies. Birth control has been linked to blood clots, stroke, heart attack, glaucoma, breast cancer, and many other health risk. It is a known scientific fact that women who have a baby, breast feed, then get pregnant again significantly drop their risk for cancers. This is due to the fact that the estrogen in our body is reduced because we have fewer menstrual cycles. Birth control contains estrogen and progesterone. Is the prevention of children worth the risk of our health?
On to sexual intimacy. No wonder most women never want to have sex! (Don’t mean to be so blunt) The birth control methods out there mess your hormones all up. God made our bodies so that when ovulation occurs you and your husband are more sexually attracted to each other than other times of the month. Why? We were made to reproduce. But what if we stop that ovulation process or keep normal acting hormones at bay? We are missing out ladies on that intense desire that happens for our husbands at that time. How fair is that?
The list goes on and on about the dangers of these contraceptives, but it is the norm. It is reported that 4 out of every 5 women who have sex have been on some type of hormonal birth control at some point in their life. In fact, people assume you are crazy and weird if you don’t use any and let nature do it’s thing. Let me tell ya from experience, ever since I stopped using birth control over two years ago my body has never felt better and I have never felt more free.
Am I making you raise an eyebrow? I encourage you to do your own research about the exact mechanism of the contraceptives we use every day. You may find yourself very surprised at how pregnancy is prevented, and all of the side effects we deem normal.
Go against the grain with me! Are there topics that you rebel against? Subscribe and share! I am planning on making a series about all kinds of topics God has prompted me to question;)
Against The Grain Series
Against The Grain (Pharmaceuticals)
Against The Grain (Industrialized Food System)
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56 Responses to Against The Grain (Birth Control)
Hey Y'all! My name is Brittany Styron. Sweet Country Roots is a place I hope to encourage, inspire, and bring a chuckle. Grab yourself a cup of coffee and join conversations about marriage, babies, homeschooling, frugal living, good food, and an old fashioned way of thinking.
Very good post with great facts and info on birth control and abortion. I feel the same way and didn’t really understand this when I was younger. Love your passion and thanks for sharing this with your audience. Blessings to you. Linking with A Proverbs 31 Wife.
” We fuss over hormones in our chicken, but are rarely upset over the hormones we take in our bodies to prevent babies.” – BRILLIANT!! Thank you so much for addressing this!! I have argued the same things you have – and mainly get an eye-roll. I am blessed to have married a man with the same values as I have on human life. And I know how rare that is. I would love for you to link this up with me at: http://missionalcall.com/kindness_approach/
When I learned the fact that bcpill was an abortifacient – I sat down and cried. After receiving assurance from my (Christian) doctor that the pill did not abort babies, we used it off and on in the early years of our marriage. I wonder how if we have babies we’ll meet in heaven that we never knew existed. Life is precious, God is the creator of life, I’ll leave it to Him to decide, we happily made the choice to leave it to HIM to choose for us, and I was ever so much healthier when not putting those chemicals in my body. Thank you for sharing your heart, Brittany!
I agree with you, its up to Him to decide. I want no part in prevention of blessings for me in His plan.
Don’t assume just because you took bc pills fertilized eggs were aborted. The pill works in many ways, and I IS possible to get pregnant and have a healthy pregnancy.
And just because an egg becomes fertilized does NOT mean it will implant. Look up chemical pregnancies. This happens even to women NOT on the pill.
I’m sorry, but I cannot look at any one of my three children and say things like, “just because,” and “chemical pregnancy”. The risk of losing any one of them, or any future children whom God might bring to us, is not worth the risk of their precious life being terminated simply because I might want to shrug my shoulders and say, “Well, just because…”. This is about another LIFE, not about what you might tell yourself to ease your conscience.
I have to plead ignorance along with you on this. I never even thought about it. You start having sex, you get on birth control. No questions ask. After reading your other post about how you were convicted to remove your iud it got me thinking. I talked it over with my husband and had it removed last week. I haven’t seen a change in my body yet but can’t wait to get back to my “natural” state. It is so sad to think all these women could be killing babies without even knowing it, myself included. Keep spreading the word!!
Thank you for sharing this! Keep us posted on how your feeling and if you notice any differences. Congratulations:)
So glad that you have written this post with information that women rarely hear. One website that discusses and presents research on the pill is http://bcpinstitute.org/home.htm.
Another alarming trend is maternal morbidity and mortality in the United States. The CDC is tracking the increasing rate of pregnancy related deaths–which I believe is related to abortions and hormonal pills.
Thank you for this website. I am always looking for more resources!
A few weeks ago, I commented on your post about having more children. I explained that because of dangerous medical problems (DVTs) I got the Implanon implant. I even linked to a post I wrote about it.I have since recanted and deleted the post because I found out that my doctor had lied to me by omission. She knew I did not want an IUD because they prevent implantation, but she failed to tell me that SO DOES IMPLANON! I also discovered that this implant was also probably the cause of my second DVT. So, I just want to advise your readers about the method of Implanon as well. I cannot undo what people read in my original post, but I have since written a second one about this discovery. http://redheadmom8.wordpress.com/2014/02/11/when-god-answers-make-sure-youre-listening/ PLEASE don’t ever assume that your doctor will voluntarily disclose everything.
Wow! Thank you for taking the time to educate us. It is very scary but we really do have to be our own advocate. How did you find out this info? What prompted you to look further into it? So glad you found out what you needed to to protect yourself!
I commented about being on implanon on a blog, and the blogger emailed me and told me to look into it. Sure enough, she was right. I checked several websites about implanon, including a pro-life website, a prescription website, and a website for teens. I’m not a teen, but I figured that I’d get true information there because, unfortunately, most teens on bc really don’t care how it works.
You should have had blood work done after you had DVT. I’m factor IV Leiden. My blood clots too much.
I did. They said that everything is normal.
Wonderful, informative post! What is sad to me is how many Christian women get so defensive about this truth. It seems like the Church seeks truth in many aspects except this one. We are very happy using Fertility Awareness Method, and I wonder why no one in the church ever recommends or talks about that. It is natural, safe, and completely free. But the biggest peace of mind is knowing we are not even chancing killing one of our own tiny babies. So glad brave ladies like you are speaking out on this issue! Blessings!
Wow. Although I went on bc when we got married, I wasn’t on it for too long. It made me sick and nauseous and the doctor kept changing me to different pills but I was just so sick for all the months I was on them. Eventually my husband and I decided that I would go off them and if we had a baby, we would welcome it! That’s when we found out that I had fertility problems.
I struggled with infertility throughout our marriage so needing bc was just never an issue for me after that. I did take some fertility drugs for awhile and talk about hormones, lol! There’s a reason they call them “the divorce drug,” lol!
We eventually discovered I had endometriosis and some other issues, but God finally did bless me with our two boys! I loved being pregnant (except for the throwing up parts, haha). Thanks for linking up to Making Your Home Sing Monday.
I was on the pill for about 2.5 years when we first got married because, as you said, it’s just what you do. It totally messed with my hormones (my poor husband!) and I went off wen we decided to have children. Since then, I’ve learned a lot and I’ll not go back on it. Pregnancy and breastfeeding are such huge health benefactors, not to mention they can both be great forms of birth control. Just the way God designed. I have 3 sons but I’ll definitely let them know about BC so they can help educate their future wives.
I totally agree. I’ve been married for 3 1/2 years and never taken birth control. My first reason was just thinking out on the potential blessings I could miss. I’ve always loved kids, and couldn’t imagine the awesome kid that I “could’ve” had. We just found out we’re expecting out third awesome kid! I couldn’t even bring myself to use condoms. The only form of birth control that I’ve used (and I know it doesn’t work for everyone) is nursing my babies. As soon as I wean, my cycle starts up again. I love my kids, and I couldn’t imagine not having them if I’d used bc. 🙁
Great post and I agree with you — preventing implantation is right along the lines of abortion….. though it seems to harsh to even write that out. I have stopped using birth control pills b/c of this, and I think it’s something many Christian women are not aware of.
Well said!
I am glad to see someone posting about this! I have never used bc. Growing up, my mom told me all about the dangers of bc and how it really is just another way of abortion. When my husband and I were about to marry, we heard about Natural Family Planning and have used it our entire marriage. The results are me knowing my body better, staying free of harmful chemicals, and expecting baby 2 in the next few months. NFP is a 100% safe and great alternative to bc. Hopefully more women will read you post and realize all the harm bc does/can do to them. Thank you for your post!
And my problem with NFP, is that you are withholding sex. I’d rather do FAM! I can’t go w/o sex for 10+ days in a month. If you can, more power to you.
You have a misconception about NFP. You might have to abstain (for pregnancy prevention) for seven days at the most. For those who cannot manage that, there are wonderful prayers you can say together, offering it up as a devotion to God. When you come back together your love is much more intense and beautiful.
But this is a moot point if we truly believe children are a blessing from the Lord. 🙂
Yes, yes, yes. Honestly, I think most women just don’t know. I had no idea that the pill actually did this until a few years ago, so there’s no way I’ll ever go back on it. I’ve been trying to muster up the courage to write a post on why I don’t use BC, so I’m glad to see you did it.
Brittany, thank you for your honest post! I myself, was informed about the effects of birth control and so my husband and I chose to use a natural form of family planning. It’s amazing how many women are ignorant on this issue, even Christian women! Thank you for sharing with the world what you have come to learn!
PS. This was the top viewed link at the Mommy Moments Link Up and will be featured in this week’s link up 🙂
Awesome! Thank you!
This is the exact reason I decided to not go back on hormonal birth control. It totally took away my sex drive (as in I didn’t really need to be on birth control because I never wanted to have sex) and just made me feel weird. I haven’t been on the pill for almost 3 years and I don’t think I will go back. I have kind of thought about it a few times (mostly for convenience sake) but keep remembering the MANY reasons I don’t want to do it. People who hear about it kind of think I am crazy, but I just want want to deal with all the side effects! It’s bad enough I already have to take thyroid hormones every day (because I had thyroid cancer), I don’t need MORE artificial hormones in my body.
Thanks so much for the post!
Thank you for posting this! We need to be more aware! I used the pill for several years and had NO idea of what it could be doing to my body or to my unborn children. We stopped using the Pill and went to NFP (natural family planning). Eventually stopped using any form of child-prevention. We realized that any form of child-prevention is telling God that we know better than He does, so we have to use some sort of plan/pill/procedure/device to stop Him from doing something stupid, i.e. giving us a child that He wants us to have but that WE know wouldn’t be a good idea. We are now trusting the Lord completely.
Thank you for sharing!
Diana
Well said 😀
I love this article, I really do. These are exactly the reasons that I chose to not take birth control pills after I was on them for the first 5 years of my marriage. I absolutely had no sex drive. After my first baby I began researching birth control and realized how they worked. I went off of them. Well, evidently I am super fertile. After not even trying this time I am pregnant with my 8th child. I am very excited. My kids are incredible, but I just don’t know that I can do this very many more times. I am 38 almost 39 and I could just keep on having children. My grandmother cycled well into her 50s. Maybe I am feeling this way because I am just coming out of my first trimester funk, our finances are tight ($324 monthy OB payment and 3 in braces for true orthodontic need) we just moved and a job change with a pay cut (hubby is a minister). I don’t know. I thought about purchasing one of the ladycomp monitors that takes your temp every morning and the whole FAM method, I just have weird cycles all during breastfeeding. Also, I am so so busy with homeschooling my high schooler, middle schoolers and elementary kiddos. I am afraid I will make a mistake. Just struggling right now. PRAY FOR ME!!!! 😉
Prayers going your way!!! I’ll tel you what I’ve been telling myself…One day at a time, or one minute at a time. Ask God for what you need:)
Thank you for the post. It is a good warning. Diana – “We realized that any form of child prevention is telling God that we know better than He does, so we have to use some sort of plan/pill/procedure/device to stop Him from doing something stupid, i.e. giving us a child that He wants us to have but that WE know wouldn’t be a good idea.” I like that. Obviously, there are a few people who actually do need the stuff in these things and there are a few people who actually medically shouldn’t have children, but I do agree with the sentiments in this post myself.
This is where I’m at right now. I just had implanon removed yesterday after I found out it prevents implantation. My doctor is really really pushing me into getting a tubal ligation because I have a history of DVTs, and I already have 11 children. I really don’t want to do it. I’m so scared of getting pregnant again, though. I don’t know what to do. I know I have to trust God in this, but when you’re in a potentially fatal situation, it’s really hard.
Tubal ligation significantly increases your risk of future hysterectomy. I would seriously research natural family planning. Charting temperatures, checking cervical fluid and avoiding sexual activity certain times of the month is so much less invasive. I will pray for you. I was 1 of 12 and my father had a vasectomy after a complicated 12th delivery. Both my parents agree that it was a huge mistake that they made in fear. It hurt their marriage for several years before they recognized that sterilization was the root cause of their problems. Again prayers!
Thank you so much!
Shelly – I am in a situation also where pregnancy is incredibly scary. Just the thought that I might be pregnant is enough to put me in a panic attack. Long story (hyperemesis gravidarum). However, I have come to the realization – over seven years – that I am still trying to tell God that I know better than He does if I try to prevent the children He wants to give me. God creates every child on purpose. If we believe that, then we can trust His wisdom on timing. Otherwise, we are telling God that we have to keep Him from doing something stupid that He might do if we didn’t take measures to prevent His actions in creating a child. This took a LONG time for me to accept, but it’s a place of great peace. I now pray, “God, help me to accept children in Your timing, and if it would be bad for us to have more children, then we trust You to withhold that blessing.” It’s now been two years since our last was born, and we still have not conceived – BIG surprise! But again, God is sovereign and we can trust Him. Children are not accidents – they are loving creations of a sovereign God, given in His perfect timing.
Thank you so much.
As a Catholic Christian, the Church has always taught that birth control is wrong. Sadly, most Catholic also use birth control and sterilization. I never used chemical bc during my marriage and my husband I used natural family to space and prevent. Here is a link that has many options. We as women are perfect just how God made us! I also had endo and fertility issues that resolved from going gluten free. Menstrual and fertility problems can be a symptom of gluten intolerance. Thank you for “going against the grain.”
http://www.usccb.org/issues-and-action/marriage-and-family/natural-family-planning/nfp-home-study.cfm
I appreciate this post so much. I went through the same thought process several years ago. Leaving birth control behind has many benefits, but I wanted to mention the deeper intimacy and happier marriage that we are experiencing because neither of us is “afraid” of a baby resulting from our union. When we accept the Lord’s blessings and provisions as He gives them, our spirits find rest in trusting in His plan rather than our own. It does take courage to let go of the control, but it is so worth it. When the days get crazy difficult with the little ones, it helps to have a long view toward the future…then, I believe we will realize the full blessings of our work in raising them.
My mom is a 2 time breast cancer survivor. When she was first diagnosed we were all shocked. She had absolutely no risk factors. No one in her family history had breast cancer, she had 3 children and nursed them all, she had seemingly done everything right. The only glitch was she was on birth control (with the exception of when she planned the 3 of us) from the age of 17 until she was diagnosed with the cancer in her 40’s. My GYN has assured me birth control and it’s artificial hormones does not cause breast cancer, however with my mom having it and 2 aunts on my dad’s side of the family I’m not willing to risk it. Doctor’s do not know everything, nor do they tell you everything. Sometimes you have to go with your gut regardless of what the “brilliant” doctors are telling you.
According to an e-mail I received from the Business of Being Born, a book about the effects of hormonal birth control will be released in 2015. Holly Grigg-Spall is the author; the title is Sweetening the Pill or How We Got Hooked on Hormonal Birth Control. Ricky Lake and Abby Epstein are in the process of making a film based on the book. The film will talk about the dangers of the pill. I applaud every step forward in getting accurate information out to women.
Yes, I have heard about this. I can’t wait to see what it is all about. I’m glad to see this information getting out there as well.
A word of caution: Strengthen your marriage relationship before and during your child bearing years. My husband and I counsel couples with large families that haven’t learned how to love and respect one another. Children added to a family like this enter a chaotic world. Often its too overwhelming for the couple to make changes with the demands of parenting. Consider the picture of marriage that is now multiplied by 10+ minds- it’s their “normal” now.
Natural Family Planning allows couples to plan for babies in a way that encourages communication. Couples have to work together. With artificial birth control our bodies become objects. The purpose of the marital sexual act is to be unitive and procreative. Sex unites and can lead to new life. Without openness, sex divides. Half of marriages that use artificial birth control result in divorce. As low as 3% of marriages who use NFP divorce. Conclusion, artificial birth control is bad for our bodies, bad for our water supplies and bad for marriage.
I seriously doubt that birth control is the cause of divorce. That’s a pretty generalized conclusion, especially considering 50% of ALL marriages end in divorce regardless of the couples’ views and use/lack of use of birth control. Also I’m sure most NFP users are Christians, so they are less likely to get divorced anyway.
I did not say birth control causes divorce. I stated the fact that 50% of marriages that use artificial birth control end in divorce and that only 3% of marriages that use Natural Family Planning end in divorce. However, we can easily look at the huge increase of divorce since the pill came on the market in the 1960s. This is no coincidence. We need to remember because we are all Christians: not using artificial birth control shows faith in Christ. Faith in Christ should be at the center of our marriages if we want them to be successful. Is it hard…yes I have 6 children, 1 in heaven and 5 on Earth. Each pregnancy has gotten harder, as I go into early labor and have terrible back labor. We pray, practice NFP and trust in Jesus. By doing this we are happy going “Against the Grain.”
I love the way you addressed that, your spot on.
I have 11 children and have been told it is highly dangerous for me to get pregnant again, and they want me to have my tubes tied. I’m really struggling with this because, while I completely agree with you, this line of thinking could bring on more discussion, such as: If I have a migraine and take a Tylenol, does that mean I’m not trusting in Jesus? If my husband has a heart attack, would surgery mean that I don’t trust in Jesus? What if a child fell and got stitches? Is that showing distrust in Him? God made us in His own image, and He gave us the intelligence and resources to develop this technology. I’m really torn.
Technology is a wonderful thing when it respects the dignity of the human person. That is a good place to start. When we disregard that we are made in the image and likeness of God we enter the slippery slope of abortion, euthanasia, cloning, etc.. Things, frankly that I need the teachings of the Church to help me understand. I am amazed at the wisdom that Pope Paul VI displayed in writing the encyclical Humanae Vitae in 1968. All of his warnings about birth control have unfortunately come true. In my experience, every time I did it my way, I suffered. When I said, “thy will be done,” God was so merciful and showed me his way. I will pray for you Shelly. Please also pray for me.
Thank you. I will.
Love your post on contraception. The very word contra (against) ception (life) is in itself telling. Avoiding pregnancy by choosing to have sex when you are infertile is very different than stopping conception, right? 😉 Natural Family Planning has been a very helpful respectful way to space children. I have found that the new computer called the Ova Cue tells you exactly when you are fertile and so that you can decide whether to have sex then. I am so proud of your honesty. I am so thankful that God brought you to blog!!!! Contraceptive medicines are abortafasions and harmful to the woman’s body. Thank you for so clearly speaking about that. God will reward you. 🙂
Just want to chime in here from a different perspective. Having a house full of children is truly a blessing but it does, indeed, take a toll on your uterus. You can’t have babies every 18 months or so without treating your body like the temple it is! You must eat properly and exercise and recover adequately after each baby. This requires some effort. God has designed you perfectly, why do you think the after pains (contractions after baby is born) are worse with subsequent babies? Why to keep you from bleeding to death, of course! But if you snd your husband are not taking care to keep you in perfect health things do not work as they should. Soon the 30 year old mom of 6 or 7 is chronically anemic and begins to look haggard and exhausted.
Thank you for taking the time to comment! Yes, I agree with your perspective. If someone is going to give up control over to God as far as the number of children then they must do their part. That involves purposefully taking care of ourselves so we can take care of the blessings. I feel that God actually expects us to care for ourselves the right way. Easier said than done…but is a must.
what a wonderfully written post….
I completely regret my time on birth control…but I do believe the Lord brings beauty from ashes and a broken heart…
I will see what was termed a “blighted ovum” in Heaven one day… and I will rejoice!!
There is no “unwanted pregnancy”… someone wants him or her… look at the thousands of couples waiting to adopt… I was blessed to receive two of those gifts!
I have had a tubal…. a decision that I made because I was SO sleep deprived and sick during my pregnancy in my late 30’s…. I regret it… I wish they would have moms wait a few months to make those decisions…
I think NFP is a great method, especially if you are guarded against a pregnancy for certains health concerns… but, I also understand why it can be a bit “controversial”…
I am teaching my children to go against the grain…. Children are a blessing!
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