My Struggles When I Became A Stay at Home Mom
Y’all I prayed. I prayed desperate prayers to the Lord. I wanted to stay home with my children. I wanted to care for them, instruct them, and love on them day in and day out.
My work schedule really wasn’t too bad. I was a nurse working an average of two 12 hour night shifts a week. My biggest challenges were significant loss of sleep, keeping babysitters lined up if my husband as at the firestation and missing them…a lot.
At the time, I was homeschooling with my fourth baby on the way. The anxiety began to slowly bubble up inside as I wondered and anticipated the new juggling act that lay before me. I continued my earnest prayers for peace and to help us find a way to get me home full-time. It was a true desire in my heart.
Fast forward a bit to 3 months after sweet Easton’s birth.
It was time for mama to go back to work. We had crunched the numbers several times and both agreed the timing was not quite right…so off I went.
It never mattered which baby I was leaving for the first time the tears never ceased to fall. Once to the hospital the tears dried quickly and I got into nurse mode. My husband and all the children did great, and baby boy took his bottle like a champ. Hearing of the night’s success settled my broken heart.
The following week came the same routine. I left my babies, cried, rolled up my sleeves and got to work.
The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD directs his step. Proverbs 16:9
Four hours into my shift my little guy had been screaming and refusing to take his bottle. (He was exclusively breastfed.) My cool, calm ,and collected husband called in a panic, as you can imagine. My heart began to race as my postpartum hormones took over while hearing my baby scream on the other end of the phone. I quickly managed my plan to get my patients taken care of and handed off to another nurse. I got home around midnight and found them on the porch…The baby crying and my husband exhausted.
To make a very long story short, little man never took a bottle ever again! We tried many different bottles, tips, and tricks. He wasn’t having it.
Deep underneath the frustration and fear lied my answered prayer, all I had ever wanted, and prayed for so long. I was officially home with my children full-time, out of necessity. Completely not how I expected it, but isn’t that the way the Lord works?
We were both overwhelmed with gratefulness that I was home… yet ya still gotta pay the bills!
My husband, being the rock star that he is, set off to do any kind of work you could imagine. He cut grass, moved furniture, cleaned out basements, landscaped, helped maintain and repair septic systems, excavated…the list goes on and on. He worked his butt off and God continued to bless him with more and more work.
We were praising God for His blessings, but y’all I’m gonna be honest…it was really hard for me, hard for both of us.
Ya see, when I was working we shared a lot of the responsibilities of the household. When I came home he had to make the living. We both felt pressure in different ways. It was a big life adjustment with four children under the age of 6, and I missed my husband a lot.
We had many arguments that first year. I needed him home to help me, but as the provider he knew he had to get out there and make it happen.
God knew and saw things we didn’t, just as He always does.
My husband has had the opportunity to start businesses, get certifications, and has introduced our family to many wonderful people and resources.
I have learned to fully rely on God. I have been able to pour my heart into homeschooling our children and have turned our house into a home. I have had the opportunity to befriend so many other women by being available to form relationships.
Our marriage has blossomed as we went through the growing pains. We are now on the same team, understanding one another. The transition was tough and stressful, but the Lord continued to mold and shape.
When you find yourself struggling or trying to, “crunch the numbers” to make something happen, remember God is in the process of directing you steps every.single.day. His plans are great, with big pictures…we must trust in Him, trust the process as He reveals plans we never dreamed of.
What are you struggling with today? God sees your heart and hears your thoughts. Subscribe and share what the Lord’s been doing.
Misconceptions of the Modern Day Homemaker
“Your lazy… a waste of time… uneducated… oppressed…you eat bonbons all day… over protective… sheltered… noncontributing… a busy body… selfish… you think your too good to do, “Real work”… old fashioned… and no fun”
Ever had any of these phrases pierce your ears? Ever felt the judgment and wondered if these thoughts were encircling others minds?
I think we have all been there a time or two. We’ve had times we let society dictate our worth. At times we have cooked, cleaned, and cared for sick babies in vain wondering what’s the point.
Read the rest over at Raising Homemakers today…
A Few Of My Favorite Things
This is a random list of my faves and must haves. Feel free to add in the comments some of your favorites, so I can check them out!
Blogs For Inspiration/Motherhood
Blogs For My Farm Dreams
Blogs For Healthy Living
Kitchen Gadgets
The NutriMill (wheat grinder)
Beauty Products
Rodan and Fields (I am in the middle of using the reverse facial regimen and LOVE it! I have only been using it for two weeks and all of my red spots, freckles, and dark circles or disappearing! Pics soon)
wet brush (my hair stylist Jennifer got this for me. The way this brush gets tangles out of wet hair amazes me. This brush has been transforming the bath time routine with my daughters since the day we got it.)
salt spray (I spray this in my hair then wrap my hair around the curling iron in big chunks. It gives my hair a messy, wavy look. This is perfect since I typically have little hands pulling at it all day)
Nutrition/Health
Young Living Essential Oils *specifically RC for my little guy with respiratory issues.
Books
Dave Ramsey’s Total Money Makeover
Educating the WholeHearted Child
I will be adding to this list frequently:) What are some of your favorite things?
This post may contain affiliate links. Head over to my disclosure page to learn more:)
Why I Hate Small Talk
Oh the small talk, I just can’t handle it. I understand at times it’s necessary. Do you ever just want to say, “Ok, cut the crap and let’s get to the good stuff!”? I’m not going to lie, I’m terrible at small talk. It is when the barriers that separate us are broken that I can breathe, and be myself…and that my friends is when the great things can happen.
Let me ask you a question…What if the awkwardness and gaps in our relationships didn’t exist? What kind of power would that hold?
Imagine what we could learn from one another. We could have the opportunity to break the walls and barriers. We could be the bridge.
The bridge that goes over different races, social statues, from the working mom to the ones who stay at home, from the mom of many to the woman in the depths of infertility. We could have the chance to get real. We could cry when we want, laugh, and love. Not just any love, a learned love. The kind that comes from conversations and stories filled of their hopes, dreams, and fears. A chance to truly understand what it is like to walk in their shoes.
My, what we could do and accomplish.
We could raise awareness for the raging racism all around us. We see protest, watch the news, and listen to the blaring opinions. Did we ever question how we are still in this place? We can’t miss opportunity to dig in deeper and really listen.
Have you ever noticed the awkward silence when a woman is in the throws of infertility: rather at a baby shower, church function, or a girls night out? We must let them know we notice them, and get over ourselves. Ask about their journey, pray for them, help fund an adoption if that is where the Lord is leading them. Infertility could happen to any of us at any time. Let’s be the bridge.
We could lend a hand to all the mothers no matter where they are working. Because they are ALL working…Can I get an AMEN? We can link up our arms circling around in prayer for one another. We can gather in the name of Jesus.
To be vulnerable is when we can really change our world. We not only gain perspective into another person’s life but we gain new perspective into ourselves and our motives.
To close the gap, we must bridge it over, built with sincere purpose. We must walk across it to the other side, often. So often, that we no longer have a side to which we belong. It is a beautiful picture of women united. Let’s cut the small talk and get personal. The wisdom gained and poured will be so beneficial.
Who’s with me? Any one else hate small talk?
Where Are The Church Ladies At?
Do you remember her? The woman who walked the pews of the church passing out hugs and candy as she searched for unfamiliar faces. She never met a stranger. When your eyes met hers you saw a long-lost friend with kindness coming from deep within. She never saw the piercings, tattoos, the worn out dress, the dirty faced children, the rushing out of the car, or your church track record. She saw God’s children, her fellow brother and sister coming to a sweet place of fellowship and worship. She instantly bought ease and comfort to tense shoulders and fake smiles. She had the power to open the windows to your soul until the pain, struggles, and aggravations poured out. She simply listened, judgment never crossed her mind.
She was an extension of all we needed. The hands and feet of Jesus. She bought the scriptures to life. She was a fountain of wisdom with words carefully separated between self and spirit. Some how she always managed to speak from the spirit. She spoke of things most don’t. Things like sticking with your marriage through the hard times, capturing the heart of your children, and of the home being the foundation and our domain. She wiped tears, wrangled children, laughed with you and most importantly spoke truth to your soul.
Unfortunately the church lady, in most cases, has been replaced by the busy body. We can feel it. Feel the judgment and can see the eyes scanning on what we feel like is our crazy mess of a family. So we hold in the struggles and try to cover the tattoos, and strive our best to shine the image of approval. We slowly forget the reason we came in the first place.
If you are one of the lucky ones with a God sent church lady then treasure her, mimic her, and follow in her footsteps.
If you don’t have a church lady then be the church lady.
Show others the kind of God we serve. Look at the people around you through His eyes. Lift them up and point them to the blessings around them. Share the truths and all about God’s goodness. Hug necks when loss and failures encompass them. Love on the screaming baby, the teen rolling their eyes, and the busy toddler.
We have the opportunity to bring in a new generation of church ladies. To fulfill the Titus 2 mandate. “Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands, and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.”
Who is ready to be the next church lady? Subscribe and share.
Sharing this with: A Mama’s story, Raising Arrows, The Modest Mom, What Joy is Mine, Growing Home, Time Warp Wife, Thankful Homemaker, Mamal Diane, Teaching What is Good, Mom’s the word, conerstone cofessions, A proverbs 31 wife, Some of the best things in life are mistakes, Let this mind be in you, A Wise Woman Builds her home, Deep Roots at Home, Graced Simplicity, Raising Homemakers, Women Living Well, Hope in Every Season, Jill’s Home remedies, Little Natural Cottage, Our simple country Life, Raising Mighty Arrows, Happy and Blessed Home, Homemaker by Choice, Your Thriving Family, New Life Steward, Hometead simple, Let this Mind Be in You,
Lavender and Diaper Rash
My second little girl battled with horrible diaper rash when she was a baby. We switched diaper brands, watched what she ate, and tried every ointment from the store you could imagine. At one point when she was on antibiotics for an infection her diaper rash was so bad that her bottom bled. They prescribed me a very expensive steroid cream and told me to mix it with another popular brand of diaper cream that also contained a slew of harmful ingredients. Being naive I took their word for it. It took almost a week before there were any improvements.
As I have had children and am learning and falling in love with natural remedies…never again will I treat a diaper rash the same way. I have found ways that will make the diaper rash disappear 10 times faster, contains one ingredient, and is made by God. Sounds good huh?
Lavender is the secret essential oil to rid your sweet baby of that diaper rash.
Let me tell ya why Lavender essential oil works so well and why you have to use it. The first man to realize how awesome the stuff was is a scientist named Rene Gattefosse. His arm was severely burned in a lab accident. When he applied lavender to his arm he saw its amazing ability to promote tissue regeneration and how quickly his wounds were gone.
Let’s move this into a diaper rash scenario. The bottom is inflamed, red, soar, has possibly blistered the skin and is at high risk for infection. Your baby is very cranky and is screaming every time there is a diaper change.
Here is where the lavender is so wonderful… It is an antiseptic and antifungal to decrease the risk for infections and fungus. It is an analgesic to aid in the pain and soreness. It is anti-inflammatory to help with redness and inflammation. The scent of lavender has a calming and relaxing effect for the crankiness. Lavender takes care of every diaper rash symptom!
Top 3 Tips for applying:
Dilute 1 drop of lavender in 1 Tbs of a carrier oil and apply to the rash after every diaper change.
Add 40 drops of Lavender oil to a couple of ounces of pure water into a spray bottle. Coat rash in spray at every diaper change.
Apply a homemade baby powder by using cornstarch with 20 drops of lavender. The lavender will act to repel moisture while the powder will absorb it.
*update* I came up with a baby butter cream specifically for diaper rash. This stuff is amazing! If I am out of this cream then I still use one of the above methods.
Baby Butter
1/4 cup of shea butter
1/8 cup of coconut oil
1/8 cup of jojoba oil
12 drops of lavender
-Place the shea butter and all of the oils together in double broiler to melt. (Except the lavender essential oil)
-Refrigerate until it turns white.
-Add in the lavender essential oil and blend with electric mixer until it gets fluffy. This cream is so soft I have even made some extra to use on my face. LOVE it!
I only recommend Young Living Essential Oils. I trust in their quality and purity and have had great results. Learn how to sign up for a wholesale account here and save 24% on your oils! You are not required to sell oils to others, you can simply buy them for yourself at a discount. If you decide you would like to partner with me and share your essential oils with others you can do that as well. Sharing is caring!
Check out my other essential oil post! To not miss any more subscribe!
How To Buy Essential Oils On A Budget
Must Have Essential Oils Postpartum
Combat With Essential Oils (Diabetes)
Combat With Essential Oils (Colic)
Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. Thanks for helping a sister out!
When Children Don’t Always Feel Like A Blessing
“Believe me, I am the first one to tell you children are indeed blessings. I believe it, and live it with all of my being. They are apart of my testimony, the reason I don’t use any hormonal birth control, and why I’m passionate about homeschooling.
I gotta tell ya, sometimes, children don’t always feel like a blessing. Know what I mean?…”
Read the rest over at Raising Homemakers today!
The Power of Submission
She is strong and influential. Her reach extends beyond the realm of her family as she walks in grace, truth, and honor. Her humble disposition draws others to her words of wisdom. Opinions aren’t worth her precious time. She speaks life into others and always seeks out the good. She has a heart of discernment and uses God’s word as her source, her guide, and her sword.
She has it. The skill of beautiful submission. She sees through the eyes of her Creator as she looks at her husband. He is the appointed leader that she compliments, perfects, and gives life to. She knows her position and she does it well. She is the heart behind her husband. She makes it easy for him to love, protect, and praise her. She sees no need to prove herself because she is confident in who she is in her heavenly Father’s eyes.
She notices the way of women today. They are all at the end of their ropes fighting to be heard, be seen, and be in control. The struggle is so heavy and thick like a wool blanket on a summer day. Her husband gives up and gives in. What is seen as a compromise is really a defeat. It’s the small prick in the big picture plan. The prick continues to ooze until most of the sweetness of the bond is gone.
The freedom comes in the submission. She simply does her role. She respects her husband and always holds him in the highest regard. Respect to a man only helps him become the man God has called him to be. What a pivotal role to have. She sees that and takes action by sitting down, letting him take the spotlight, and holding his hand through it all. What a beautiful power she has to turn a man into a leader. What a privilege to watch and to fully anticipate.
She knows the power behind her submission. She knows the God given order for family and abides by it. She is aware it is for her best interest. The submitting to her husband is not something she takes lightly. It isn’t her obligation but rather her calling. It is her calling to lift him up, cover him in prayer, and bless him all the days of his life.
Let’s take off our angry disposition as we push him to the side to stand in front. Instead… Let’s be that soft landing place at the end of the day. Let’s be the first one they want to call with the good news and bad. Let’s be the woman worth protecting and investing time into because we are seen as precious. Let’s make his life worth living. Let’s point him to the Savior. Let’s always aspire to be the woman who understands the power of submission.
Are you encouraged here? Please subscribe and share your thoughts on submission.
Photo credit Pixabay
DIY Flu Stopper
This is the third year I have revised this article. You have to make this stuff!! It is a staple in our home.
A few years ago I found myself desperate. I had three children at the time and was stuck in bed with strep throat and the flu…Oh, and my husband was at the fire station. In an attempt to get myself out of the bed as soon as possible I started looking for some home or herbal remedies to speed up the process. I couldn’t afford to be out of commission for very long.
Through all of my research everything kept pointing back to elderberries and all of the amazing properties they contain to prevent and even fight against the flu. Up until this point I had never even heard of elderberries, but like I said, I was desperate. I figured it couldn’t hurt to try.
I went to the store to get my ingredients for a recipe on elderberry syrup I found on the blog jillshomeremedies.com. This recipe is frugal friendly and makes a lot. Once at home I wasted no time making it and started taking the remedy soon after. Since I was so sick I consumed it every hour starting that afternoon until bedtime. I slept the best I had all week.
When I woke up, I’m not kidding, my symptoms were gone!!! I was still a bit weak from not eating or drinking but the sore throat, fevers, and body aches were no where in sight. I was able to care for my children and get back into life.
From that moment on I started telling everyone!! If someone came by my house not feeling well, I served them up my concoction. I have had numerous people in my family and friends talk about how wonderful the elderberry syrup was and how fast it took away their symptoms.
Every flu season I make a fresh batch. I have even made some to give as part of birthday presents this time of year. My goal is prevention for my entire family. I take thrill in the least amount of doctor trips as possible.
Here is the recipe I use. If you go to Jill’s recipe she also includes a video tutorial that is really great.
Elderberry Syrup
- 1 cup dried elderberry I purchase mine from the Bulk Herb Store.
- 2 cups water
- 1 1/2 cups of raw honey
- 1/2 cup raw apple cider vinegar
Simmer elderberries in water for 30 minutes. Mash them, then strain into your quart sized jar. Add in honey and vinegar. This keeps for 6 months in the fridge.
Kids 5ml
Adults 10ml
For prevention you can take it just once a day. If you end up getting sick it is safe to take every hour until your feeling better 
My kids love the taste and ask for it everyday. The raw local honey and the apple cider vinegar only add to the awesome health benefits of this syrup.
I could seriously pour this on pancakes.
For The Mama With the Special Needs Child
“I see you. I see the fear, the joy, the anxiety, the worry washed all over your hopeful face. You have pride for this child beaming from your heart paired with a fierce protection to uphold the innocence in their souls…”
Head over to A Mama’s Story with me and read the rest. This is a tribute to my mother.
Hey Y'all! My name is Brittany Styron. Sweet Country Roots is a place I hope to encourage, inspire, and bring a chuckle. Grab yourself a cup of coffee and join conversations about marriage, babies, homeschooling, frugal living, good food, and an old fashioned way of thinking.
